which is, of course, not the best idea

if you are using only your back. Because

the wall is too large and while you often feel

small, you are not an ant

 

able to shoulder twenty times your frame.

So, you will need something else and maybe

it is your art, just wood and canvas and old

chipped paint. A glowing two by four

 

from the police barricade and something of a door

you father saved, the painted canvases of friends

and Dawn’s teeth, all of Dawn’s teeth could hold

up a wall if you know what

 

I mean, didn’t we call her from behind your father’s door

to whisper nobody was going to love her pimples

and curly fried hair because didn’t we first love

her pimples and curly fried hair

 

at the chalkboard, over the paper mache, her red

and white neck, like our own peckers bursting

for free and didn’t we think we could hold a wall

with her a long time, could fuck

 

while holding a wall, could do our taxes and feed birds

from sanctuary below the wall, camp with our children

and raise a little tree for Christmas. That wall would halo glow

and so maybe you need

 

to palette a love too, a mural

strong enough for a wall.

 

First published in Something Fine, 2012.